The Ah Ha Moment You’ve Been Waiting For…
Recently I was having a call with one of my truth tellers, (a friend and colleague I mastermind with where we’ve committed to challenge one another to live into our highest potential where our lives and businesses are concerned), and she said a sentence that knocked the wind out of me…
She said "I don’t care about other peoples’ feelings."
I was dumbfounded for a moment, but ultimately extremely curious how this fits in to my spiritual truths that I seek from my soul.
In other words, I wanted to feel into whether or not this resonated (or could resonate) with me.
Silently I was thinking to myself "whaaaaat?!!? How can you not care about other peoples’ feelings? What kind of cold hearted bitch would I be if I took on this belief? What would that look like? What would that feel like??"
As she went deeper into what she meant by that, I could see more and more clearly how absolutely freeing it would be to stop taking responsibility for how everyone else feels.
When I think about the weight I’ve carried on my back, on my chest, on my soul, worrying about my family members, worrying about my siblings, worrying about my best friends, worrying about my spouse, worrying about my clients and how they feel and how I can make them feel better and how I’m not doing enough for them and how I should be doing more…Going out of alignment for the sake of people pleasing…
It feels like I’ve been carrying a 2 tonne load over my shoulders for years. (And for my fellow Louise Hay fans, I’ve also been having inexplicable shoulder pain for years as well).
At an earlier stage of my evolution, these worries drained me financially. I would give money to family members that were struggling, more than I had to give, because I felt like it was my duty to save them (little did I consciously realize at the time).
When I learned that I didn’t have to be financially responsible for everyone around me, I thought I had let that part of me go.
But a deep seeded need to save others (because of a certain subconscious belief rooted in my childhood) really just exchanged me feeling financially responsible for others feelings to feeling energetically responsible.
Maybe I wasn’t going around giving money away trying to save the feelings of my family members - but now I was giving something even more precious away - my energy, my soul, my self worth.
It was all attached to whether or not I could save others, make them feel better.
So what would life be like, if I allowed people to be responsible for their own feelings?
What if, yes I care about the feelings of others, but I am not attached to their ups and downs, energetically?
How much of my own energy would be free’d back up for me to use in much more powerful ways?
How much more of my own truth would I be sharing, unapologetically?
How much more authentic, aligned, and in-spirit would I be, if I took 100% responsibility for my own feelings, and gave that same respect and space for others to be 100% responsible for theirs?
When it came down to it, the phrase "I don’t care about other peoples feelings" doesn’t fully align with my being, but this one does;
"I love you enough to remain unattached to your feelings - giving you the power to own them, grow from them, and expand because of them - and I take 100% responsibility for my own feelings - giving us both the freedom to speak, to be, and to live, our full most authentic truths, our full most authentic selves."
What do you think, beauty? How does it feel for you to detach your self worth from the feelings of others? Comment if you’re open to it - I’d love to hear your perspective on this :-)